Magical Gifts and Goodies: Fireside Blessings

Photo taken by author

Wood harvested each fall is always a marvelous gift. Our bodies used to be capable of filling the truck bed as well as a large car trailer up with logs. Now as we are in our 'silver years' we are happy to retrieve a pickup truck load of wood from the forest, at a time. This load was a huge blessing. Our neighbor and friend used his tractor to pull out several long branches of a huge oak tree that had fallen down, but was not easy to get to. 

Together, we all worked to harvest the wood, for us and for them. We split a lot of wood each year. We take the larger chunks and they keep the smaller pieces to put into their wood stove. Just as we were feeling the muscles start to burn out, another friend appeared. She pitched right in to help us all get loaded up with wood. It was a blessing in so many ways. My muscles were tired, I was hitting the wall, and I thought I was done. My energy was depleted. 

However, when she appeared, her energy was contagious. I was able to keep cutting, while she picked up the chunks to hand to my husband, who was in the back of the truck. Together, we made quick work of it and before we knew it, we were done. We stood around and chatted for a while, which was also a blessing. I felt joyful, happy and confident. After a year of pain, sorrow and sadness, feeling confident again is an amazing feeling. I honestly enjoyed communing with others. I could speak my truth. I could laugh, I could hug and I could be connected, in the moment, in a positive way. 

In the past year or so, being around most people was hard for me. I couldn't join in on the fun. I couldn't speak my truth confidently, I felt sad and bitter. I felt judged and as if I couldn't do anything right. I wanted to crawl into the woodwork and hide. I didn't feel confident in myself. I knew I was not in a good place emotionally, so, I hid as best I could, when I could. I wasn't at my best. I had nothing more to give. I had run out of fuel. I had lost my spark. 

Early retirement was my opportunity to heal. Healing from losses I may not ever discuss openly. Healing from my mother's difficult journey of pain before she crossed. Healing from losing my dear friend and my 2 senior dogs within days of each other. Grief can be a difficult road to travel, but fortunately we don't have to stay in that low vibrational energy. We can heal, we can thrive and we can be strong and feel confident with others, once again. 

Photo by author

Today, as I sit in front of a roaring fire, I can reflect back on the moment I realized that I am whole again. I knew I was on the mend when I started to decorate the house in a creative way. I knew when I was tapping into my wisdom and life was easier. I knew when I wasn't tearing up and crying while talking to others or watching sappy movies. I knew when I could feel empathy and compassion again, instead of feeling numb and empty. However the powerful moment when I realized, deep down into my heart, that I have bounced back and let go of the painful thoughts, was when I could confidently speak my truth in a why that was without feeling grief, loss or pain. Magically, my soul is dancing effortlessly, like the flames in the fire. 

Was it easy? No, it was not. Like gathering, splitting and stacking wood to fuel the fire, it took effort to heal. It took time, it took energy and it took patience and persistence. Patience, because healing couldn't be forced by myself or others. Persistence, because I couldn't remain where I was at, mentally, emotionally or physically. It took both patience and persistence from myself, my family, my friends, nature and of course my angelic team and 4 legged family, too! I feel blessed to have opened the amazing gift of resilience. To be comfortable, confident and healthy in my own skin again, is truly magical. A spark is once again lighting a fire within my soul. 

My muscles have been throbbing since we gathered wood this week, but I know from experience, that they too will recover and I will be stronger for the next time we harvest, split and stack the wood to fuel the fire. My heart was throbbing, but I am stronger now. If or when I feel grief, sorrow or judgement again, I will give myself time to remember what it feels like to be whole again, because I have experienced being resilient. I will remember to be present, patient and persistent. 

Have you recovered from a difficult experience in your life? 

Can you remember a time in your life when you were resilient? 

Do you remember the moment you realized that the spark of confidence, happiness and joy was lit deep within your soul again?  

Manifest a day.